Thursday, June 30, 2011

TiLT - 30.6.2011

Via Yum & Yuk

Yesterday was a really bleak day. Today is absolutely spectacular! The sun is out, the sky is blue (it’s beautiful, and so are you), and I’m smiling! Here’s my list of blessings to be counted:

* Teal Tuesday. It’s better than a Blue Monday, right?

* Making a list of random things I want to achieve for July. More on this later. ;)

* Writing down my goals, and listing the steps it’s going to take for me to achieve them. I’ve always been terrified of planning because my plans usually fall to pieces, but I’ve sucked it up and set some goals and listed every step I’m going to have to take to achieve them. It’s a new-ish concept to me, but it’s worth a shot!

* Simba’s farewell party, and all the weirdness that went with it.

* Heidi’s amazing concepts for my ½ sleeve! I totally swooned, like a 13-year-old with a picture of a Backstreet Boy.

* Starting to de-clutter my desk at work, planning to de-clutter my bedroom & office at home, and, by extension, my life.

* The Beatles

* My awesome new leather-look biker jacket. I am kind of in love!

* This quote: 

* My Jay Jay’s Sex Pistols and Nirvana t-shirts. FTW

* Settling on a theme and costume for my birthday party.

Via Design Sponge
* Pure glitter manicures. That photograph like my ass. Still, awesomely pretty and SOOO much fun to do!!! (I’ve been leaving a trail of pink and black sparkles wherever I go)

* Adele

* Pasta with grilled chicken strips, creamed spinach, peppadews & Parmesan. With extra fresh jalapenos on the side.

* Getting back into the writing frame of mind.

* Getting back into the walking frame of mind too.

Little things that made me smile:

* Tall Horse Merlot * Crystal clear winter skies * Adcodol. There’s a reason it’s the colour of sunshine and happiness * Water for Elephants. What a warm-n-fuzzy story! (I don’t usually do the warm-n-fuzzy, but this one was fantastic!) * Being in the grips of Big Bang Theory addiction * “They’re like the X-Men of the Moron Race” * Crocheting * The King’s Speech * Buttermilk Ouma Rusks dunked in hot coffee for breakfast * Grey knitted tights. So warm! So comfy! * Getting Mister Boo to have a haircut * Strengthening bonds with people who matter, and closing doors on those who would drag me down with them *


Wednesday, June 29, 2011

We interrupt this program....


There will be no Wednesday Wonders today. It's not that I have nothing to be happy about, it's not that I have no blessings to count. I do! A whole fuck-load! Just... not today. I hate today. Today is my Daddy's birthday, and he's not here to celebrate it. Today is a month since our first Newtown experience in Oz, and I wanna go back and sing along to karaoke and perve at the clean-17-year-old-Kurt-Cobain barman without a care in the world. Today is the day one of my best friends left Joburg, for at least a year. And it's taken until today for my cellphone service provider to let me know why my phone has been blocked. (For the record, it's because they are Super-Morons. They are the X-Men of morons, only infinitely less awesome.) Today sucks.

Normal programming will resume tomorrow with TiLT, and maybe even another Aus Round-Up post!

Friday, June 24, 2011

Back from the Land Down Under! Feat. Steph and Andrew's Beautiful Wedding

Some of Ana's gorgeous little touches throughout the day
Early on Saturday morning (and I mean EARLY, as in 5am) we dragged our cold, sorry asses out into the cold, dark morning, and headed off to Flemington Market for flowers. Once I was awake, I was reeeeaaallllly excited, and as the sun started to rise over Sydney, we made our way into the market in search of beautiful hot pink roses. And damn, did we find! It took us a little while to figure out that under the artificial light, the colours were a little different, but once that penny dropped, we found just what we were looking for. And then some! Once we were laden with roses, we stopped for a coffee, and then, on our way home, got a take away brekkie. By the time we got home, my stomach was revolting against me for the assault the night before, and I had to lie down for a little while. When I got up, I felt MUCH better, and got to work on the crafting and flowering and creating stuff, which we did for most of the day. We went out for pizza that night – deeeeviiiiiiiiiiiine!!!!! – and got all our stuff together while Steph made her last few schedule revisions before turning in.

Bright and early on Sunday morning, the pre-wedding mayhem began. The make up artist and hair stylist arrived and pinned Ash and I down and went to work. When they were done, Ash had beautiful tumbling curls and I had movie-star make up. I may have gasped when I saw my reflection… I want airbrushed foundation every day! It makes for such smooth skin! Anyway, once that was done, I went off to wrestle with my hair while Ash had her make up done, and then I got tangled in my dress. By then, the photographers had arrived. I think that’s when it started to sink in… our best friend was about to get married! Cue squeeing and eeping!!! Once I wriggled it into some kind of order, Ash helped me get it all together, and I sewed her into hers. I fear there may even be a snap or two of that! Hehe Once Stephy’s hair and make up were done, it was lacing time! I was nominated to lace her into her magnificent dress, and I was damned if she was going to fall out of it! Scenes from Titanic and Pirates of the Caribbean came to mind as I asked her if she could breathe. Her reply? “It doesn’t really matter if I can breathe, as long as I don’t fall out.” Hehehe We got her all dressed and looking gorgeous and then raced around adding the finishing touches to our own ensembles, before rushing out the door.

The drive to the church was short enough that the glowing bride didn’t stress (too much), but long enough for us to giggle at the appropriate playlist on the radio and wave to random people who gushed as they were crossing the road. And suddenly, it was time! We got there and before we knew it, we were being ushered down towards the ceremony site.

Ash descended the stairs gracefully and beautifully in her sensibly-heeled shoes, setting an impossible standard for me to follow. Naturally, on Step No 1, I almost tumbled down. The only way I could prevent ending up face down in the centre of the aisle, with my dress over my head and my gorgeous shoes* on opposite ends of the garden, was to go with the momentum and literally bounce down the stairs.

Relief! I made it!

Most Rocking Bridesmaids Ever?
There was nothing else for it.** Somehow, I balanced without waving my arms around like a lunatic, and got down the aisle unscathed and not the butt of anyone’s jokes.***  

Here she comes!
The ceremony was incredible, just gorgeous! Craig, the celebrant, was fantastic! There was humour and tenderness and I know I was grinning like a Cheshire cat through the whole thing.

Peter & Julie

Very proud mom & dad
It was so special to watch my friend, the one person who’s been at my side since I was ten years old (even if it was in spirit for a lot of that time), on one of the happiest and most cherished days of her life so far. I felt so proud and honoured to be a part of that.

Mr. and Mrs!!!!!

Once the ceremony was done, there were some huge group shots, and then everyone moved off for canap├ęs and cocktails on the balcony while the bridal party did photos. And photos. And hey, more photos! We had such a blast with the photographers! They were just great, so much fun and they put everyone at ease.

Dashing brother / MC / All round awesome
Ash and I giggled our asses off for most of them! Especially when I snuck in a Blue Steel for the individual bridal party portraits, which gave Matthew a good laugh. Also: I rocked the hell out of the smize. Thanks, Tyra! I fear that Ash and I may have disturbed Andrew’s best man and groomsman a little with our crazy ramblings, but hey, we kept them entertained, so our mission was complete! We eventually got a few minutes to sit and have a drink (Vodka and Lemonade, the drink of champions!) before the official introductions and then… the marvelous meal! It was just spectacular! Delicious risotto stuffed into a banana pepper, succulent lamb shank, chocolate glace on a Ferrero Rocher base… and divine mini chocolate cupcakes, iced in hot pink! Deeeeeeelish!

There was craziness and randomness, but not too much chaos and mayhem, which just meant that everyone was laughing and having a fantastic time. I'm pretty sure Steph's vision for her wedding was realised when she saw how happy everyone was.

Then, suddenly, it was time for the bouquet toss. It was hysterical to watch the not-so-keen girls step to one side as the flowers flew through the air, and the more enthusiastic girls rushed forward. It was also completely bizarre to not be shoved into the crowd of single ladies. It was quite strange to know that the pressure of the bouquet toss will never again be thrust on me, because I ain’t gotta catch no flowers to get hitched! Hehehe Once that was done, it was time for the newlyweds to head off into the sunset for their first night as Mr. and Mrs. in their gorgeous vintage car! We waved them goodbye and then it was all over.

Bon Voyage!

Until next time, my darlings!


* I was totally impressed with my Iron Fist shoes, by the way. They were super comfy for the most part, except for the last hour.
I think it was when I started sinking into the grass for the last few photos that the pain started, and then it just. wouldn’t. stop. But all in all, they were perfect. They made me bounce, got lots of envious stares from the most unexpected people (Hi Marina! Hi Luke!) and made for one very rock-n-roll bridesmaid and one infinitely cool wedding.
** Hope the video doesn’t show the momentary panic I felt when I started going off-kilter. I tried to smile through the whole ordeal, but might have looked a little… maniacal. Sorry Steph! Sorry Andrew! Sorry Opa!!

*** Well, not that I heard, anyway!

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Back from the Land Down Under! Feat. Hot Child in the City

After the tender-hearted (and, if I’m honest, tender-headed) Koala Park excursion, we had a manic day in the City to look forward to on Friday. I think, if we’d known what was in store, we might have prepared a bit better. With, say, milk thistle?! Instead, we settled on the Hair-of-the-Dog method, which resulted in some preeeety interesting stories. We took the train into the city central station, which is just gorgeous! Steph protected me from a weirdo who started making his way over to me – thanks honey! – and we swiftly set off on foot into Sydney.

First port of call: Paddy’s Market. It was fun wandering around all the different stalls, from fresh produce to souvenirs to random crap that seems to feature at every flea market worldwide. It’s at Paddy’s that I picked up my beautiful didg, along with the bulk of the souvenirs and gifts I brought home. When the artificial light and noise got too much for us, we slipped out of Paddy’s and into Chinatown, which is where Steph introduced us to the confectionery interpretation of Heaven: Emperor Puffs. Bitesize hot, fluffy, light pastry, filled to bursting with hot, gooey custard. I’ve decided that Heaven is being inside a hot Emperor’s Puff and eating your way out.

Straight from Heaven
We meandered along the main market walkway of Chinatown, and I pouted when I found a McQueen-esque scarf, but in the wrong colours. The vendor didn’t have any other colours, so my budget remained roughly intact.

From there we headed toward Darling Harbour, and Ash and I were mesmerized as we turned the corner and were faced with the Chinese Garden of Friendship.

What better way for the three of us to celebrate our journey together?!?!

So we forked out our $6 each, slipped past a pregnant, semi-corseted bride-in-black and wandered around for a while. I fell in love with the beautiful little island of tranquility and peace in the middle of the bustling city, and went off at a tangent for a while.

There was a fleeting moment when I thought I’d been abandoned, only to see my friends totally absorbed in the twinkling water near the entrance. (I think they may also have been listening in on the wedding ceremony happening behind them, but hey…)

We wandered through Darling Harbour and, after deciding against a water taxi that cost $25 to Circular Quay (!!!!!), we caught the ferry, and some GORGEOUS sights (including another Friday Bride!). We strolled around a little, but ultimately ended up at the Orient again. We had a couple of drinks to warm up while listening to a cute boy play the guitar not-very-badly-at-all, backed my Friday-business-drinks-talk. And when Steph and Ash went to the loo, I was almost – almost­ – offered a drink by yet another weirdo. Lucky for me, they got back in the nick of time, and bought me one for my troubles! The end of the Orient-leg of the night came shortly after they changed the channel from a Super 15 game featuring the Stormers to some other sport channel featuring a tiny local rugby league club.

 We met up with Stephy’s parents and aunt (who all looked super cool and cosmopolitan chic!) and we all headed over to the Sydney Tower 360 Restaurant, which is a revolving restaurant. You get the most spectacular night views of the whole freaking city.


It revolves quite slowly, but when you’re a leeetle bit tipsy, the motion is quite fun. It took me a while to balance and actually see evidence that we’d moved at all, but once I saw the motion, I was thrilled. It was so much fun! Also: the chocolate tart! It’s a chocolate martini that tastes like heaven, but somehow sobered me up. It was fantastic!!

When we parted ways a little while later, the three of us decided to call it a night and headed back to the station. When we got there, we saw that we had loads of time before the next train, so we pulled into McDonald’s for a bite. We were lucky, because as we nibbled and nommed, Ash had a wonderful time perving at a group of cuties and we discussed their merits in Afrikaans. Rude? Maybe. Worth it? Totally. Set the trend for the ride home? Without a doubt! When we ambled back toward the platform, we realized that we’d miscalculated something somewhere, because we’d missed our train by about 17 minutes. Ha! We scanned the boards and came up with a back up plan: Epping Station. Once we’d got our tickets, we scuttled off in search of the platform and leapt onto the train, giggling like the tipsy three we were! I settled in and took in my surroundings, letting slip an “Ooh, asseblief ja!” as I laid eyes on a cute boy in the upstairs carriage.

The girls were curious, and Ash summed him up pretty well. “He looks like a mix between Victor Matfield and Mick Jagger.” Testosterone and glitter in one? “Yes please!” The trouble was that Steph thought we were talking about someone else, a little dude who looked to be about 14. We tried really hard to be subtle, but I’m not sure it worked, what with the sniggering and giggling and, every now and then, a cackle. We tried our best to explain the situation to her in Afrikaans, but it all just ended up like a game of VERY broken telephone. When she finally got onto the same page as Ash and I, her only comment was that he looked like he needed a bath. I may have volunteered to give him one, but she very cruelly reminded me that she only had a shower at her house. “That’ll do,” I giggled. It was only when she brought up the fact that he would need a bed too, and it would likely be the futon-cave I’d created, that I gave up. There was no-way, no-how that I was going to share that cozy cave with ANYONE. So, score one for good behavior (for once in my life!) Still, by the time the train stopped, we were wiping tears from our eyes as we hung onto each other in hysterics.

And thus concludes the story of the dirty-train-boy.

Until next time, possums!


Still to come: Wedding Round Up; Cruising Sydney; The Entrance Road Trip; Newton Part II; Coming Home; What I Learnt in Australia

TiLT - 23.6.2011


* Tuesday night was the longest night of the year, which means that from yesterday on, the days start getting a little longer again... It's the first step towards summer! Usually I'm all about the defence of winter - my birthday's smack-bang in the middle of winter, so I've got to love it - but this one is taking its toll on my like none before! I've had the Seasonal Sads, which is really out of the ordinary! But now I feel like we're on the right path, heading in the right direction! Yay!

* BBC's Grow Your Own Drugs

* Planning new things for my hair

* Into the Wild. What a beautiful movie! I've been wanting to see it for ages now, and finally did on Saturday night. I was surprised at how it spoke to me, because I was really expecting to take a different message away from the story, but it was moving, to say the least.

* Stepping out of the box again

* The Shining. I've just finished reading the book (which I picked up for a whopping R40 last week), and I thoroughly enjoyed it! Now I want to watch the movie again. Just as well I have the DVD, huh? Also: squeeing out loud when reading Stephen King's prologue and stumbling across one of my favourite quotes in history! "Monsters are real, and ghosts are real too. They live inside us, and sometimes, they win."

* Birthday Party Planning! It's less than a month to my birthday, and I've decided it's time for a theme party again! We used to do at least two a year, my birthday and New Year, but for the past few years, people have been scattered around at New Year, so it's time for another theme now. I'm rubbing my hands with glee as I plan this one; it's going to be epic!

* Preparing lunch the night before work, for less wall & other stress

* Last Wednesday's spectacular lunar eclipse... I was wholly enraptured!

* Water for Elephants. (The book.) I picked it up yesterday morning while I was waiting for my lift, and I'm already halfway through it! It's wonderful!!

* Starting to enjoy my outfits again. I've been in a bit of a rut the last month or so, but I'm getting back into the funky side of my wardrobe, and enjoying it!

* Reefer Madness!

* The little rasp in my voice. I've been down with the Sydneysider Plague since I got back, but finally feel like I'm dragging myself in the right direction... Health! When I get there, I will miss the husky effect, though. It always seems to add a bit of mystery to any conversation, don't you think?

* Being able to laugh at myself. If I took myself too seriously, I would have died of embarrassment at my own antics years ago!

* Planning an epic manicure, which I'm going to attempt tonight. If it works, you'll get photos! If not, you'll never hear of it again. Probably.

* The fabulous Father's Day brunch we had at the Garden Shop on Sunday, with Grumps. It was so nice to get out the house as a family and just enjoy being together. And we had sunshine! Yay!

* My sparkly pink peace-sign necklace, which has replaced my lost-on-the-streets-of-Sydney crows foot

* Feeling inspired and making new plans which honour the committments I made to myself while I was away

Little things which made me smile:

* Jazzing things up * My family and friends * Reliving my holiday through my Australia Round Up posts * Waffles for brunch * Hot pink manicures * Planning new walking routes & workouts * Planning my escape * Patience * Hot baths at the end of rough, cold days * My humidifier working again - bliss * My little blue fleece blankie that keeps my legs warm under my desk - without it, I'd be doomed! * Mid-week philosophical discussions *

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Back from the Land Down Under! Feat. Koala Parking

So, after a rough and crazy night in Newtown, and pouring myself into bed at 3am, I was doubtful that we would get around to what we’d planned for Thursday. But, for some weird reason, we were all up around 11h00 that morning, wrestling for the bathroom. So, once we were all cleaned up and, more importantly after such a hectic night, coffeed up, we stumbled out the door and headed to the Koala Park. It wasn’t a long drive, about half a km, and when we got there, we were thrilled to see that there was virtually nobody else there. We practically had the run of the place!

We had a fabulous time wandering around and seeing most of the animals the park offers. I was looking forward to seeing a real-live possum, but the best view we got was a possum's arse. He was snoozing, and no amount of coaxing could get him to show face! 

Incidentally, I felt like a possum's arse when I woke up!
 We were trudging along quietly at one stage and as we turned a bend, I saw a dingo perched up on a mound, and when he spotted us, he started to howl, which set off the rest of the pack. It was quite eerie!

They’re much bigger dogs than I’d thought they were, and surprisingly, much more beautiful too. I could have stood there for hours watching them, but it always breaks my heart seeing spectacular animals fenced and caged in, so I shuffled off behind the girls and paid the birds a lot of attention. It was then that I learnt that the only wild animal Steve Irwin was afraid of was the cockatoo, which made me giggle.

The face of terror?

The rosy face of terror??

A Little Penguin (Not only a description, but its name too!)

Gan-Gans, or something....
The next corner we rounded was led to a pretty awesome area of the park… the koalas! I found them totally mesmerizing when I saw ones that were awake, and wholly adorable when I was watching the little ones sleeping. Bonus points for getting to touch one!!!!

I don’t know why, but I was reluctant to touch him at first… I think the uneasy feeling from the dingoes had settled in and I was just feeling a little creeped out. But, at Steph and Ash’s insistence, I relented and stepped up to tickle the little critter! I’m so glad I did, because that experience turned the dingo-creepies on their head, and I was filled with such joy! The little guy was nomming his eucalyptus branch placidly, and when I touched him, I was surprised to feel just how thick his fur was! It was like running your hands over a softer-edged, less itchy thick carpet! I gave him a good old tickle and he seemed to enjoy it, although not as much as I did, I think. I was really bummed when it was time for the next person to give it a go… I was trying to figure out how I was going to smuggle him out of the park, and country, in my handbag when his handler called the next person up.

We stuck around for a few more minutes before heading to the next area… the kangaroos! The laziest buggers I’ve come across since a pride of lions! Just look at them all lying there soaking up the chilly summer sun, not a care in the world! 

 I really enjoyed hanging out with them; they were really awesome! Higlights of that part of the day?
1) Watching a joey disappear into his mother’s pouch, right before our very eyes! David Copperfield has nothing on that little guy!


2) Scratching a kangaroo's ear while her joey was all cozy and bunty in her pouch! Eeep!!

On our way out, we tried to get a good look at the sleeping wombat, but he was all “I am sleeping! Go away!”, so we gave up on that. We started feeling the ill effects of the night before and went off in search of some nourishment and recovery. We had a pretty quiet evening, punctuated by a stunning Thai dinner, and a relatively early night, because we had a huge adventure to look forward to the next day… THE CITY! That's going to be its own post, because that day (and night) turned into another crazy and random one!

But, before I go....
Until next time, possums!


Coming Up: Hot Child in the City, Wedding Round Up; Cruising Sydney; The Entrance Road Trip; Newton Part II; Coming Home; What I Learnt in Australia

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Back from the Land Down Under! Feat. Newtown


On Wednesday night, Stephy, Ash and I headed into Newtown, Sydney. Up until then, I’d felt pretty underwhelmed by the Sydney vibe, even though we’d had loads of fun at The Rocks on Sunday. It just all seemed very… straight-edged. But Newtown?

So very different!!!

We were going to Newtown for a reason, which was for Steph’s then-soon-to-be-nephew’s farewell party. (Did you get all that? Her then-soon-to-be-nephew. Andrew’s nephew. And this was the week before the wedding. Hope that clears things up for ya.) He was having a big ol’ get-together before jetting off to Europe for two-ish months; and she and Andrew, and by extension, Ash and I, were invited. I had an idea of what Newtown would be like beforehand, because everyone who heard that we were heading there looked straight at me and said, “You’ll fit right in with that hair and those tattoos.” Apparently, the more… alternative Sydneysiders congregate there. I was intrigued at the very least. And when we discovered that there was at least one store in King Street that sold Iron Fist? Well, that resulted in three very excited ladies on the train on the way there!

A couple of people had said that Newtown is a little on the dodgy side, and I was hoping so, because I had yet to see evidence that anyone in Sydney breaks the rules. Newtown restored my faith in rebel-kind, though, thankfully! We saw a couple of junkies, some drunkards, at least one hooker and, one of the highlights of my trip, someone getting arrested. One guy, drunk and leering. Two cops couldn’t do it alone, so before we knew it, there were two unmarked cars pulled up at the lights and another four plain-clothes cops piled out and assisted in restraining this guy. Granted, he was a big-ish guy, but really? Six cops? Steph found it highly amusing how at home I felt in the only place we’d seen someone getting arrested, and witnessed what could have been (and probably was) a drug deal.

*shrugs* I’m from Joburg…. It takes a lot of rule-breaking to phase me!

The stores in Newtown were awesome. We arrived there quite late, so didn’t get to enjoy too much shopping, which is probably just as well for my bank balance, but the selection and variety of stuff was fabulous! Everything from old-school record stores to Rockabilly gear to button shops and crochet and knitting schools / coffee shops. Oh, and LOADS of adult stores. At least one per block. I squeed and did a little jig in front of a record store which had a genuine original Birthday Party t-shirt in the window, next to an Iggy Pop concert poster. Luckily we had a time limit, otherwise the girls may never have torn me away from that window. We motored on to Faster Pussycat, in search of the perfect pair of Iron Fist shoes for Ash.

When we got there, I was instantly besotted. The shoe display is at the back of the store, directly opposite the door, and Ash and I gasped and clutched onto each other as we both realized in the same moment that, not only did they stock Iron Fist, but Bordello shoes! 

We may have become two little puddles in front of the shoe display as Stephy tried to get us to control ourselves. It can’t have been an easy task, but somehow, she did it. I wandered around taking in every last detail of the store, and almost turned inside out when I realized the guy behind the counter was sporting the most inspiring Rockabilly sideburns I’ve ever had the pleasure of witnessing. It was really, really difficult to leave!

Sadly, they didn’t have the Iron Fist shoes Ash was coveting, and she’s not one to settle for anything less than her dream, so we somehow left Faster Pussycat empty-handed. I stole one last glance at the cutie shop guy and his prolific facial stylings, and we moved on up King Street in search of Freaky Tiki. We found it pretty early on, and loathe to be the first at the party, we moseyed back down King St a block or two and found a sleazy, dingy little pub to settle in for a few pre-party drinks. And drink we did! It was also that night that we took our subtle appreciation of hotties to an as-yet untouched level of perving, and it started with the gambling man in the dingy pub. Ash was on the hunt of an Aussie hunk, after all, and three pairs of eyes are better than one! (This also happened to be the only time and place I heard anyone playing any Nick Cave for the duration of my stay, so I was pleased as punch that we’d wound up there to kick-start our party!)


Once we’d had our fill of perving over hot gambling men while engrossed in pretty intense conversations, backed by the madness of the Bad Seeds, we made our way over to Freaky Tiki. We’d all had a drink or two by then and made our way directly to the bathrooms, where, while I was complimenting a pink-haired girl on her Edgar Allen Poe t-shirt, Steph noticed this on the back of the bathroom door:

*ding ding ding* It was then that I knew there was no going back from the crazy realm we’d entered a few stops back. Not long after we arrived, Luke, the boy of the hour, arrived and freaked Steph out a few times by introducing her as his 'soon-to-be-aunt'. She wasn’t ready to accept that, even though he’s only a couple of years younger than us, she was on the threshold of being his New Aunty Steph. I thought it was pretty cool that he was about to acquire such a cool Aunty, and she such a cute nephew, but I don’t think she was prepared for that aspect of getting hitched.* Hehe

The downside of the Freaky Tiki part of the night was that the music of choice was all hip-hop. Now, don’t get me wrong, hip-hop has its place in the world!** Clearly there are people out there who are into it (God-knows-why) and they were all having a wonderful time. We tried, we really did (we even danced, to no avail), but we just couldn’t get into that bass line, and sauntered off after a couple of drinks, leaving the young ‘uns and their Fifty Cent (or whatever he calls himself now) behind us.

We were at the mercy of the Universe and the elements once more, and ambled back down King St in search of a) another Pure Blonde, and b) a bathroom. What we found was a hidden jewel! I’m not sure what it was that drew us all in at the same time, but it could have been the adorable bouncer (Yes, adorable. Don’t ask. He just looked it.) Nonetheless, we all stopped at the door, looked at each other, and nodded.

Kelly’s on King it was.

*Barmen not included
We stepped into a very warm Irish-style pub which was in the midst of karaoke night and felt like we’d come home. Especially when we laid eyes on the barmen. Lord! Have! MERCY! Young-ish. Tender-ish. Mouldable-ish***. SO much of sexyish!!! My pick of the bunch? The one we nicknamed ‘the 17-year-old-Kurt-lookalike’. Yea…. He bore a pretty strong resemblance to Kurt Cobain, if he’d had a haircut and stayed off the hard shit. Naturally, I was enraptured. I’m not sure where we got the ’17-year-old’ part from, but I imagine it was from Ash, who I recall reprimanded me with things like, “You’re a married woman!” (My response: “Everyone has a Freebie List. Even my husband! And hey, Kurt Cobain is on mine, alongside the word ‘Miracle’. Tell me you don’t feel the Spirit at work in this place?!”) and “He’s way too young.” (Me: “I can look at the kiddies menu! Even though I’ll go home and have a grown-up meal!”)

Between perving at the barmen, we became the unofficial back up singers for… well, pretty much everyone who had the balls to get up and do a song for karaoke. Steph and I were keen to dust off our old Rocky Horror fave, Over at the Frankenstein Place, but couldn’t find it (which made for two very sad ladies in Kelly’s, spending lots of time at the bar,… drowning their sorrows). Instead, we just chimed in strategically with everyone else’s songs and the three of us decided we should start marketing ourselves as professional back-up singers. We even agreed to be based in Sydney, as long as we could keep going to Kelly’s to rehearse. *cough* A deal was forged and practice began immediately. (Added bonus: We harmonise over most bad karaoke, so it doesn’t sound quite as horrendous. Justsayin’. Although there wasn't much we could do about an especially off version of this)

Our first Newtown Experience came to an end around 2h30 that morning, once Andrew had had enough of alternately awesome & awful karaoke and I had to get away from the semi-toothless**** guy who was trying to hit on me. When I realized what he was trying, I decided it was time to get moving. We apparently went in search of Kebabs or curry or something in Auburn, but I have pretty much no recollection of that beyond saying, “How long till we get home? Coz I might need to hurl.” Shortly after that, I have a kind of fuzzy memory of pouring myself into bed, vowing not to get up before sunset. I make these promises, but I never keep them…

Until next time my little potato wedges!


* Hope you’re starting to get used to it, darling!

** Down at the green end of the musical gene pool, with all the baggy pants and skew hats. But that’s just my humble, rock-minded opinion.

*** How appropriate that spellcheck suggested 'Mountable' as a substitute for the apparently non-existent word 'Mouldable'

**** This was the beginning of the revelation that I seem to have a theme song. This I seem to have the natural talent of attracting weirdos. Steph pointed out, though, that like attracts like, so I shouldn’t be alarmed that the weird ones find me. Still, to be safe, I’ve already made a dentist’s appointment. Just as a precaution.
(As an explanation, Stephy did mention that, while medical care is free is Australia, dental isn’t included in that, and is quite expensive, which is why it’s not uncommon to see tandelose manne en vroue roaming the streets. I guess in an area like Newtown, where junkies roam free, teeth are an incidental, not a necessity…)

Coming Up: Koala Parking; Hot Child in the City; Wedding Round Up; Cruising Sydney; The Entrance Road Trip; Newton Part II; Coming Home; What I Learnt in Australia